Archive for the 'music' Category

Narratives

My thought for the evening (or morning as it may be).

Narratives; we all create them, we all use them to justify our actions. It’s too easy not to, sad but true – why so sad? Because we’ve got so used to doing it that we don’t even notice we’re creating them anymore.

We write a story in our mind that makes our lives easier to live with. Possibly putting people in places they don’t want to be. Justifying our actions even further.

Sometimes it’s not about the reactions, sometimes it’s about the situations you’re being put in and the situations you are putting people in.

But taking a step back and seeing the truth of our words and actions for what they truly are is sometimes far too painful. Why wouldn’t we create a narrative, putting things in our favour, making situations so much more digestible? I mean, why wouldn’t you?

And here’s a bit of King Krule for you…

Cause I’m a working man

No time for absolutely anything else apart from work lately. Sorry Mum and Dad, it’s not that I don’t want to talk to you!!

My weekday goes as follows (weekends I skip going in to work, instead I go directly to the new apartment:

  • Wake up as early as possible – > Go to work.
  • Finish as early as possible if having started early -> Go to new apartment.
  • Work on new apartment until it is too late, or I am in too much pain to continue -> Go home back to old apartment.
  • Eat something on the way home -> Get home, go to bed.
  • Repeat.

I will eventually create a decent post describing the exact steps we are up to. Just received a quote to get the guest bathroom done, let’s keep in mind the bathroom is about 3 meters square. The quote was for 10,000 euro. I think we might just get a second quote…..did I hear someone say Berlin was cheap? Trust me, those days are fading very quickly indeed.

Anyways, here’s a track I like a lot at the moment, it kinda gives me the feeling of the struggle I am currently dealing with, although touching on different topic matter, the struggle is the same…….as can be the sorrow….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szyrvlz0BVE

To buy or not to buy!?

So, back in Germany and getting grounded again.

It was pretty sad to leave Sydney, and I really only realise now in retrospect how sad and depressed I became upon my return. I guess I should have expected it really. Anyway, am once again used to being in Berlin and am definitely enjoying it just as I used to.

Unfortunately I was thrown into work relatively hardcore. I mean, I never really stop working entirely, even when on holiday – if only to reduce the amount of e-mail I have to catch up on when I return. But this time kinda sucked a bit. I returned on Thursday, which I thought was a good plan, 2 days work and then the weekend. And that part of the plan went ok. It was only the next week that things started to get tough.

  • Firstly, I started noticing all the mistakes my team had made in my absence.
  • Secondly, one person on my team went on their planned holiday, whilst another person in my team simultaneously went off sick for the week.

As you can imagine, the workload suddenly became quite large. What with both catching up on work as well as filling in for two people that were away. I mean, my team is only 5 people big, and when two are away for whatever reason simultaneously, resources become very tight. That’s why I usually plan it that two people on my team are never away at the same time. Unfortunately I can’t predict the future, so sickness is something I have to live with. Just unfortunate that I’d only been back here a week before that happened.

So life was immediately pretty bloody stressful.

The really funny thing was when one of my colleagues came back from holiday and said she’d take it easy getting back into work – because that’s what you’re meant to do – and I thought to myself “If only I had that luxury”. What a rude shock reentering the country it was.

Amongst all of this, my CEO would like to migrate my position (Director Technical Support) to a more management focused position as far as I can tell. Which is fine by me, the only thing is that I first need a large enough team with the resources to look after the workload independently without me having to step in too much. At the moment, that just isn’t possible, I don’t have the resources. I am constantly ‘getting my hands dirty’ so to speak.

On another note, I am getting a new work computer to make my life a little easier. A pretty powerful laptop which will give me the flexibility to work anywhere within our building. Lately I have really been needing this. Albeit, I have a laptop and a workstation at work, but the laptop is not powerful enough to do any real work. And the more I am focusing on management and less on the basic job, the more I need to work in silence in order to concentrate where I do not have the constant interruptions that I have had to deal with up till now. Let’s see how that goes. I really like my company, and my job, but get quite sad when I feel so much stress from the job just because of the workload due to certain limitations.

Anyways……I am finally building up the new bike I’ve been talking about forever. It breaks down to something like this:

  • Dartmoor Two6Player Frame – 2100g
  • Spank 777 Bars – 318g
  • Primo Boy Grips – 15g
  • Twenty6 F1.2 Stem – 118g
  • Chris King Headset – 230g
  • Fox 34 831 Forks – 1930g
  • Chris King Hubs – 164g + 411g
  • Titanium Spokes – 270g
  • Dartmoor Raider Rims – 1100g
  • DT Swiss Rim Tape – 20g
  • Michelin C4 AirComp Latex Tubes – 260g
  • Continental Race King Tires -1100g
  • Formula R1 Disc Brakes – 534g
  • Raceface Bottom Bracket – 92g
  • Raceface Next SL Cranks – 400g
  • Raceface Next SL Chainring – 25g
  • Chris King 12 Tooth Sprocket (calculated with hub weight)
  • KMC X9 Super Light Chain – 242g
  • Twenty6 Predator Pedals – 340g
  • Twenty6 Seat Clamp – 18g
  • Nukeproof Warhead V2 Seatpost – 235g
  • Octane One Rocker Saddle – 295g

Coming to a total estimated weight of 10.22kg – I might be able to get it a little lighter due to the fact I can cut down the seatpost, but that is about it really. So around 10kg for the entire ride, which isn’t too bad I guess and which I’m sure my back will appreciate!

Really looking forward to when it’s complete. The 24″ BMX is just getting a little too hard on my body to ride anymore. Sad really, but then again, it has lasted me the last 8 years, so I think it’s perfectly fine going up to a 26″ at this point in time. Here’s hoping it’s a bit more of a comfortable ride. I mean, it should be. Bigger size with a suspension fork, should be quite different. First time I will have ever had disc brakes too! Will post pics when it’s done 🙂

What else has been on the menu?

Well, on top of that is the fact that as you might already know, Ina and I have been trying to purchase an apartment here for the last year or so. Well, we found another one that we really like and have put an offer in. It’s on Schönhauser Allee 27, is a rooftop apartment, is spread over two floors – level 4 and 5, and seems about perfect. Ok, not absolutely perfect, but very nice. The only detractor is that it is only 2 rooms. 1 bedroom and 1 living room. Ideally we wanted to have a 3rd room to work in etc. But it seems that we can’t quite afford that, so this will have to do for now. Anyway, the apartment, as well as the location are freaking perfect, and I really like the fact that it is spread over two floors with a large terrace facing a pretty good direction. The positives far outweigh any negatives! The only rather sad thing is that it means I would be moving out of my current apartment with Thommy and Hans. Since moving here I have really got to know these guys and I think we have all formed a pretty damn good friendship. It will be sad not to see them on a regular basis anymore coming home from work after having moved out, but I guess that’s life – nothing lasts forever. I really hope we stay in touch though and don’t become like all too many friends of my past. We’ll see. Really great guys which I have been lucky enough to get to know.

But that’s about it, those are my travels of the moment. So a lot of exciting stuff going on all over the place, work/home/life. It’s all good. And on top of that it is coming into Spring and everyone is becoming happier and easier to deal with…..yay!! So on that note, here’s a nice drum and bass track to remind us all of sunshine and all things good:

No news is good news right?

So, I guess it has been a while since I last posted.

Was in Australia for nearly 4 weeks. I guess it made me realize that:

a.) I am lucky enough to still have a pretty strong friend circle over that way after all this time

and

b.) Even though it’s expensive, I could totally live there again

Not to mention that it’s a pretty friendly place to be. Now that might seem strange and fake to an outsider, such as someone who grew up in Germany. But the fact of the matter is, that’s just how we are raised. When we smile and ask each other how our day is going, we are being polite and friendly – to not do so is considered strange, and even rude.

It all depends on how you were raised and what you are used to. What it really highlighted to me though is that I would way prefer someone being nice to me, even if it meant they were lying to my face, rather than being brutally honest and rude at the same time. I can live in ignorance, that’s fine. I don’t have to be miserable.

And who said being honest requires you to not be friendly? Don’t forget, even if you make yourself smile, although you might not be happy about anything, your mind will follow and you will feel happier 🙂

Anyway, did we get any of the tasks done that we were hoping to? Well, in a word, no. The aircon is not installed, the bank loan hasn’t been swapped over to another bank, about the only thing we got done was finally putting our stuff into long-term storage. Not sure how long-term that will be though. Between you and me, I’m slowly getting pretty sick of this place. I guess it has lost most of its charm on me by now. Berlin is a great place if you like the nightlife, but once you get over that, you realize that culturally, it is missing out on quite a bit.

At least we skipped winter though, came back here and Winter seems to have vanished, I mean, it’s 20 degrees today – which is madness! Good madness!!

Was meant to get an operation on my knee today, but it has been rescheduled due to some kind of difficulty. Now it will be on the 21st of May, and I will be getting a general anesthetic. Oh the joy. Not really looking forward to that, but then again neither am I looking forward to the operation I’ll have next week to remove one of my remaining wisdom teeth. It is lying sideways under other teeth so I have no freaking idea how they go about extracting a tooth like that. All I can imagine is that it is going to be painful once I awake from the general anesthetic. Really not looking forward to it.

Oh well. Have a great weekend, and catch you on the flipside 😉